Is This Your Monkey?

There’s an old Polish proverb: “Not my circus. Not my monkeys.” I learned it years ago and have been known to shorten it to, “Not my monkey.” 

Once, when I was a fractional Director of Development, the team was surprised to hear me talking about monkeys like it was completely normal.  

Here’s the thing. That team was full of high-functioning, deeply committed people. The problem was not talent. It was focus. 

The previous leader had everyone working on everything. Every project had too many cooks in the kitchen, too many opinions, and not enough forward motion. People were in each other’s lanes, and the actual work kept getting delayed. 

So, we introduced a new filter: Is this your monkey? 

To reinforce it, I brought in a stuffed monkey for the office. Naturally, we had to name it. The quietest person on the team nailed it: “Dewey.” As in, Do we get involved… or not? 

We All Need a Little Dewey Energy 

Dewey still sits in that office today, silently judging and reminding us. And honestly, often the best fundraisers (and let’s be honest, leaders) need a little Dewey energy. 

Because in our world, it is very easy to confuse being helpful with being busy. 

• Planning centerpieces for the gala 

• Running last-minute errands because “no one else can” 

• Sitting in every CRM or data conversion meeting 

• Weighing in on programs, finance, or HR decisions that are not yours to own 

• Jumping in to open mail, batch gifts, or “just help for a minute” 

None of these are bad things. But they are also not your primary job. 

This is not about refusing to be a team player. It’s about protecting your focus. 

Your work is relationships. 
Your work is revenue. 
Your work is moving donors forward. 

Every time you say yes to the wrong monkey, you are quietly saying no to your caseload. 

So before you jump in, pause and ask: Is this my circus? Is this my monkey? 

And if it’s not? Smile. Step back. Let someone else shine. 

Dewey would approve.