A Story in Four Words: Call Your Lapsed Donors

Call your lapsed donors. That’s it. That’s the story. It’s not complicated. And yet… it’s not getting done.

Why?

• Fear

• Time

• Competing priorities

• “I don’t know what to say”

• “What if they’re upset?”

• “What if they say no?”

• “What if they don’t answer?” (spoiler: then you leave a voicemail and keep going)

Before we dive in further, let’s define what we mean by “lapsed.” We’re typically talking about donors who haven’t given in 12 to 18 months and are worth a re-engagement effort. Most teams won’t remove a donor from a caseload until they’re 18-24 months lapsed. Translation: we aren’t asking you to track down someone who gave once, five years ago. We’re talking about donors who were recently engaged… and may be wondering if anyone noticed they slipped away.

So, why don’t we call these donors? Let’s start with the biggest blocker:  what do I say? We’d gently reframe that to: what do you ask?

We’re big fans of permission-based questions. Yes, it can feel a little clunky at first. No, donors don’t mind. In fact, it signals respect. You’re not calling to interrogate them about their giving history like it’s a forensic audit. You’re calling because you’re genuinely curious about them.

Try something like:

• “It looks like we haven’t received a gift in a while. Would you be open to sharing a bit about that?”

• “I’m curious, is that something you’d be willing to talk about?” (That word, curious, does a lot of heavy lifting. It softens. It invites. It keeps the door open.)

• Another favorite is “I noticed you didn’t give last year, after X years of giving; is everything ok?” This shows you know them and genuinely care about the relationship.

Because here’s the truth: we are excellent at making up stories. We’ll tell ourselves:

• They’re mad

• They’ve moved on to another organization

• They can’t give anymore

• We did something wrong

Maybe. Maybe not. There’s only one way to find out. (Hint: it’s not more internal speculation.)

Pick up the phone. Yes, time is real. And yes, your current donors deserve attention. But if someone is assigned to you and they’ve lapsed, they’re not “less important.” They’re just… waiting.

And when you do call? More often than not, you’ll find a very human reason:

• Life got busy

• They meant to give and forgot

• Their circumstances shifted

• They’re still connected, just quiet

• They gave, but your system recorded the donation in the wrong place.

And often, they’re simply grateful you reached out.

We’ve seen it play out again and again. One recent example: a new mid-level officer at a small organization called a donor whose last gift two years ago was $300. The donor re-engaged and made a $1,000 gift. Their largest ever. Not magic. Not a perfect script. Just a call.

It’s not hard. It’s just avoided. If you take nothing else from this, take the four-word story:

Call your lapsed donors.

They’re not as scary as the stories we make up about them.